Just found out you can rent the rollerena for 100 bucks and you can bring your own beer... when are you free this week?
I won't be sarcastic... just naked
I just realized I have my pepper spray, gun, and vibrator all in one drawer. One false grab and I'm screwed either way.
This guy kept running around with a blender giving people shots of everclear and vodka. Best. Toga. Party. Ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He is eating chips off the floor in the emergency room..
He ran around the party with a broken foot/ankle with a gallon of Malibu yelling "it must rain coconut"
But I mean, have you ever just LOOKED at how majestic penises are? They are like ivory columns of pure wonder!
well, at the moment I'm sleeping in someone's closet in a buzzlightyear snuggie, so I can't judge,
Totally forgot I asked the cop for a theoretical fist bump and he still let me drive away
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just want to apologize again for asking to spot your form in the shower.
Idk man there's lots of bad dick but even a bad cookie is still pretty good
I was doing handstands in the jail cell and crying “IM A HIGH SCHOOL TEACHER AND IT’S CHRISTMAS EEEEEVE”
Yeah but the jokes on her right? We just got a new couch and hers still has a cum stain on it from like six months ago
Do you lock your house? Serious question, I need to know if I can add it to my list of emergency poop stops
I smell Vodka. It's me. If anyone asks it's totally hand sanitizer.
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