Was it a mistake telling him I couldn't get the abortion until I was 2 months along on the first date?
Now that I'm the boss, there's nobody to yell at me for smelling like a bar in the morning.
so i told him i still liked him. he laughed
well, your crazy. what did you expect?
after we had sex last night he told me he smelled like my vagina. and then he said that if his roommate had a vagina he would probably smell like it. because "they hug weird and shit."
You've had your dick in my mouth. I don't think there are all that many barriers in our friendship at this point.
don't forget friday is see who can get the most free drinks at the gay bar contest. winner gets $50
Seriously though, you almost tore my right nipple off.
You gotta hand it to him. 6 hours in a new town and he's already fuck someone, had his ass kick by her bf, and rounded up a posse of people to kick this guys ass.
Favorite thing said to me in 2012: It's like you have two tongues!
Were you keeping a list?
I just ran into the woods like an idiot because ADVENTURE.
The inflatable penis from those pics was mine... We broke him that night
A guy was over-the-skirt fingering me on the dance floor and I stopped him to sensually rap in his ear. So that was my Halloweekend
Note to self: Never spend $8 on a liter of rum again
Emojis can't explain what he felt when that ass dropped
I think I met my butt stuff soulmate
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