This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
Man THE POSTAL SERVICE is awesome when I'm high..... But they suck when I'm sober.
You dont ever try to use your dick as a power washer to get bits of poop of the toilet bowl?
Nothing like a Mormon bachlorette party to make you feel slutty
we just plugged the camera up to the big screen. would you like to come see what you did last night, in high definition?
You had salsa out and brought a banana on a plate to bed
She just kept saying "bless your heart" to him while he cried because he came so fast. I think a Texas woman was just what he needed
I think a kid would responsible me up
I'm trying to ve beat feiesnd sent.
I found my hair extensions. They were in my hamper.
It seems that only way I've actually improved myself after 2 years of writing for the school newspaper is that I've mastered the art of descriptive words to improve my sexting skills
Well I'm sleeping with two of them cause they have nice cars. And the third cause she has a big rack. I'm just really waiting for it all to blow up in my face so I can find a girl I'm actually interested in
One minute we were playing beer pong, and the next minute I was sprinting to my apartment with a watermelon. wtf happened in between?
Let's get a hotel room this time. I really don't want to sleep in a Dennys parking lot again.
Well, I crapped my pants in front of her entire family, was laughed out of their house, and I had to walk home with shit stained pants. So, yeah, it went really well.
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