The duggars are the reason premarital sex is ok. Because if you don't have it until marriage you have no self control when it happens. And 19 kids.
The only bad thing about this relationship... my forearm strength is dwindling
dude what did you give her she's eating her pocket lint
I am now trying to reassure her that she doesn't have a wide-set vagina. So thanks, for whatever you said.
I just want to know who nailed the chicken nugget to the door.
GO AHEAD, BITCH, GLARE AT MY WAFFLE ONE MORE TIME. I WILL FUCK YOU UP.
Mom looked at me, frowned, and said "it makes me sad to see you drink before noon.." So i told her if she doesn't like it she needs to stop waking me up before noon.
someone cut his neck open pretty bad with a broken beer bottle. We were so close to his house that we carried him home, but when we got there he casually laid on his bed and said he was just gonna sleep it off. WHO DOES THAT
Well I'm going to hell. But I'm going after multiple orgasms.
I can only rely on you and Taco Bell
I just noticed, at some point last night I got on iTunes and purchased over 100 classical piano songs.
I threw up in 4 different Starbucks across the city before 9 am.
I'm the one who said we should take things slow. I'm also the one who forced him into the back on my car so we could have sex.
Just made my first drink, took 2 sips feel like god
Shame is for Republicans.
Randomize
