Yo dont text me then not text me
We all just poured out a sip of our drinks for you. One for our pussy whipped homie.
I know ur sleeping, sorry for waking you but i just saw a girl with mittens on using her nose to control her ipod touch
better to have posed nude and lost than to never have posed nude at all...thats what i always say
and I believe it was when I was running to class to take a test still drunk in my Halloween costume that I realized I have reached that point in the semester where I just don't give a flying fuck anymore.
Like "oh its Monday, gotta get wasted today!" not "oh its Monday.. Gotta go to class"
I just ate beer and cupcakes for breakfast.... maybe this fourth of july won't be so bad
Between having seen you naked and interpreting your values based on the occasional political FB post, you're no stranger for sure.
I got his number because he was "impressed with how much I could handle"...I was chasing shots with Olive Garden breadsticks...
It's Reggie from Taco Bell, send me a pic.
We met up and made out in front of an empanada spot, if that's not romance then idk what is.
I'm worried about how taking care of my mom's dog while being on acid will go.
It's official cum is not a great leave in conditioner
He drove me to my therapist appointment because I was too drunk to drive. Total keeper.
All I know is when I asked you how many fingers I was holding up, you said "Hippo"
Randomize
