So there is this guy preaching the word of God outside our club. I went up to him and said, "God made this body, and he made it for premarital sex." Sup, Hell?
If i'm not hungover, near death, and wondering what i did the night before on Monday, life is not worth living.
...She then said get into the spirit and started making firecracker noises while having sex
What's the big deal? you guys fuck
3 times is my limit. I don't even want to know you exist after 3 times
I stayed up for hours making sure you didnt pass out in a mountain of your own puke. But when I heard you yell AWWWW FUUCCKK, somehow I knew everything would be ok
i'm not a hellocoptur, but youer in a dorm ans im un a dorm
Can an epipen be used as a tranquilizer ?
his finger was half off and he was more concerned that he wasnt at home shooting cucumbers out of his potato gun.
It started out as friends with benefits and now I'm picking up her kids from daycare...what has happened to me
DRAW HIM A PICTURE OF SOME FUCING AWESOME THING. LIKE A UNICORN OR SOME SHIT. FANTASTIC.
Just do it. I grew some lady balls and did it last year. It's your turn. Time to show what you're made of. Hit it or quit it.
I almost took a picture but it looked like he might have a shank and I'm just not at a place in my life where I could handle having tetanus
I just jerked off in front of my dog to make him jealous of my thumbs. There are consequences for stealing the last cheeto!
Good news, my sex bruises are fading. Bad news, my boobs look like I have a skin disease because of it.
Your dick. My mouth. We have 20 minutes.
Randomize
