I'd rather drink alone in my closet than hang out with that girl
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
come over. we are watching hoarders and playing i spy.
Omg just woke up. 6am. random apartment. broad daylight. bunch of ppl doin coke around me. Theres a bridge nearby. I think my dentist is down the block. Oof.
i normally make it a rule to leave when white people start rapping... but they had blow.
dude you cant keep breaking into my house just to raid my fridge.. especially at 3AM.
I've decided, even as much fun as it sounds, I don't care for his sodomy box.
Can we go to Home Depot next week? Drunk Kim broke my toilet with a hammer.
I had to feed him the pizza because he was too blazed to do it himself
It's a good cause. For your vagina.
True love: he brought me a margarita while was in the shower. He's a keeper.
And then she sprinted three blocks through live traffic towards McDonalds screaming "THE GOLDEN ARCHES ARE CALLING ME"
Stop calling him just to say, "my vagina misses you."
u woke up and asked who took ur pants off then realized u did n almost cried over not gettin layed
All I could think about was how many vaginas had been on the toliet that I was pukin in
Randomize
