We should go out drinking together soon
I'm still not going to have sex with you
Ooooh. That's not a mole. Uncomfortable.
And i laid in the yard with carrots on my chest cause i wanted a bunny
If that really is brett favre's penis, no wonder she ignored his calls
I tried calming him down but his eyes are rolling to the back of his head and he's yelling "COMA WEED!"
I have a very important question for you: what are some good rules to have if we want to turn the nfl draft into a drinking game?
She makes him look at her naked pics before she sends them to someone she's actually going to fuck. I think this makes him mayor of the friend zone.
No dude, he just dipped his cigarette info ranch dressing and lit it. He's said he normally doesn't do that but it's Memorial Day.
He hasn't responded in 6 hours and the last thing he sent me was a picture of 7 grams of coke. I'm getting kinda worried
Let's be honest I'm gonna watch murder she wrote and eat taquitos at three am
Last year I got a dildo in the mail on my birthday. Today it was just a credit card bill. Sadface.
Look, I've got a really big car. We just need to put ourselves in it and put some body parts in other body parts.
I dunno that I'd be trusting enough of junkyard tequila to drink it.
I was covered in mud from my knees down, I smelt like the inside of a port-a-potty and only had mascara on one eye. . . so you know your usual Sunday brunch.
So uh. Your future in porn. Would you be willing to wear an alien costume for it?
Randomize
