Someone in my class is wearing shirt and on the back it says...National Bible Quiz Finalist 2006. Do you really expect me to find a guy here
Besides, I'm not in my 30's. I'm still allowed to drink wine from a bag.
Nothing kills the mood when I am hooking up on the dance floor like the DJ saying Happy Valentines.
Just KTHXBAIed an old man for staring at me
Hold my feet while i lean out of the window of the truck.
i am one more weekend without sex away from dosing him with viagra and locking ourselves into a closet.
I remember nothing except the fact it happened and I ate doritos and we highfived a lot
You put your name in his phone but not your number then screamed "Open the door!" and jumped out of the car
Hahahahaha. That's what your stoned ass gets for eating half a bag of processed cheese at 2am.
My dad just told me I can't passout in the driveway after the 4th of July parade this year, again
He deadlifted me and I came just a little at the apex
It's important to establish I slept with her BEFORE we officially became cousins-in-law.
I'm fucking blazing boy. 5hr weed sauce kicked in and my entire face feels like an 8ball of gold bond flying down a mountain of Fresh powder. Just gliding.
I will run into the sunset with a fist full of condoms.
The first thing you did was give us a tour of the house and showed us who was "on-limits" and "off-limits"
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