I just want you to know that me val and amanda are drinking on top of a hill lookig at the chicago skyline drinking icehouse and we just peed in public.
i gave him head before the novacaine wore off...i think his penis touched my lung
I hate it when hot girls behave. It's so anticlimactic
You never go ass to mouth. That's quite possibly the most important rule Paramedic school has taught me.
We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob
She's the perfect storm when it comes to psycho stalkers
Well it's a moot point because I did have a sink & I peed in it.
Because Kyle had a tattoo kit at his house and I wanted one and all he could draw was a mustache or a stickman on fire
The cab driver gave me a church card yesterday and said I should reconnect with god.
Then he gave me 2 tickets to a movie he's going to be in
Then he rubbed shampoo all over my arm and shouted, "Garnier FUCK THIS."
It was a shot marathon. It only ended because we werent drinking in our house apparently we walked into the nieghbors. When they got home thy were soooooo pissed.
I swear to god if you eat that last piece of pie while I'm gone I will never speak to you again. I'm so serious.
Just wiped the ashes off my forehead before he came over to have sex. Definitely going to hell.
Alcohol and IMDB don't always mix with 100% accuracy
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
Randomize