I just want you to know that me val and amanda are drinking on top of a hill lookig at the chicago skyline drinking icehouse and we just peed in public.
I'll have you know...trying to masturbate while a song about jesus is stuck in your head is next to impossible
I discovered the grieving process is shock, denial, anger...and then something about drinking until you puke on yourself
you were the first one he came out to and you announced it as the finale while singing karaoke at the bar
If he thought that flying across an ocean to visit me in London constituted sex, he thought wrong.
Its a Guy he gets weed for. I'm kinda confused as to why there are going to even be tuxedos involved at all.
Btw, whenever you feel discouraged about your life, think about me being frantically upset bc my mobile porn site limited me to only 5 videos a day
It probably isn't a good idea to go home with last night's hookup's brother. And sister.
Probably is probably an understatement.
I could really do without pictures of your asses in my inbox. That said, I'm extremely jealous that I wasn't involved.
I mean you guys are my friends and all but if you fuck with me I will not hesitate to set you on fire
This chic sharing the cab with me just started givin me head. I'll be an extra 5 minutes.
Btw. U, me, male strippers, beer. Gonna happen. We could totally get TNT from like u know TNT places
His ass WILL be my cock's next vacation home.
I wish I had a dick so I could say shit like that.
All I want to do is get high and needlepoint. Fuck your judgement
I passed out in my bed, but woke up on the dog bed,with no pants, snuggling with toilet paper and a bottle of softsoap. Ive hit a new low.
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