I always wonder when I meet a guy from online if he needs a moment to mentally register and accept the size of my ass. maybe ill wear a dress.
is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
Situation: He got it in my eye, how long do I let it sting before should start to worry?
the bouncer kept askin you for id just to see how long it would take you to find your pants
don't leave me alone with all the disney princess sluts
Dude its barely eleven am and there is already a firetruck and ambulance at the shamrock...happy st paddys day
Do you think I can haggle my way to discounted weed on 4.21?
This Xanax laced vodka tonic will help me forget that all these spring breakers are all young enough to have been my students.
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
Is it possible to just pretend that everything we did after grilling up your goldfish didn't happen?
I had a drink called "the white nun." It tasted like Marshmallows, and celibacy.
PICK ME UP NOW I THINK THIS MOTEL IS A CRIME SCENE. also congrats on your engagement i saw the post on my phone while i was climbing out the window
My idiot ex texted me on Valentine's day to tell me I was right, he did need a therapist.
I have no idea what to do with myself since we graduated.
I've just been napping and sexting all day.
he's single and there are thong briefs.
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