God dammit. Now I'm pissed at Arizona, while feeling bad for my poor, poor penis.
If I were a woman I'd fill my water bra with liquor so that I could sip on it throughout the day.
it's just weird having a massive boner in the morning when you could have used it the night before.
I have decided that a Nickelback cover band would be the pinnacle of loserdom.
I wish they made helmets for livers.
I miss being able to drink at 11am just cause it was sunny outside.
I'll be honest. I knew what I was getting into. I'm not proud, but I'll be damned if I'm ashamed. 6 month draught is over. That's justice.
I just had a flash of memory of me asking all of the girls if they were on their periods. If they said yes I said it made us moon sisters.
So I know we're not talking about this anymore buuuuuut I left heel marks on the wall.
well i don't NEED my liver but it's nice to have one when you're trying to have a good time
with the possibility that i could very easily fall in love with him and i've actually talked to my HUSBAND about it
The doctor basically called me a dirty dick.
They're gonna put "is a hoe" on my medical records
I'm over here trying to figure out how to get shake shack delivered to my bed and Jamie is having a child
All I heard was "sit on my face" "okay" and muffled screaming. I'm still disappointed.
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