We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
It's just you. You wear the fuck me fedora and wear baller shorts, hollywood hippie who thinks she is shakira when she's drunk.
i sold my breathalizer so i could buy weed
i know. thats why i need an open bar. i'll get hammered and make a toast about how his dick is like the titanic. large, but full of failure.
Got high and weighed everything in the house. My head is 16.2 pounds. Is that ok?
i feel sorry that you can never enjoy the feeling of shaved balls
I just came inside of a Gatorade bottle. That hungover.
I'm literally taking a shit naked holding a bottle of wine.
I wish I had a Tina from Bob's Burgers in real life. She would be the best wingman.
The amount of dicks I have seen in the last hour is more than I have seen in my whole life.
The minute he showed me his Mumford and sons tattoo is the minute i could literally feel my pussy dry up
just saw the most amazing side boob. i wanted to hold it.
Dude I just clenched/unclenched my hindquarters while looking in the mirror I have fucking talent
I just got a handjob in the back of an Uber while a large German dude and a Midwestern fuck-boi sang along in falsetto to the Bohemian Rhapsody.
Yes. I had to slow down my handjob so he would last...-and I give shitty handjobs to begin with
Randomize