My "High Times" magazine came in today, as well as my girlfriend's new sex toys. We're calling in sick today.
all of his pictures were taken on a library computer, how did you even consider fucking him?
I'm trying to think of how to explain to the dentist tomorrow that I think I pulled my jaw muscle eating pizza while drunk.
if you are still a virgin by winter break we are throwing an aztec themed sacrifice the virgin party
Codeine + Boredom = Sprinting between my front and back door.
He brought wine and beer. I'll put my pants on for wine and beer.
He's worked out some sort of arangment where all three of them are dating each other and they've all moved into an apt. with two king beds pushed together
A true beacon of hope in these dark times
I started blowing him in North Dakota, and I finished the job in Minnesota. Oh, the places road head can take you.
Oh please not the Easy Cheese again. That was weird.
Bought asot tix too. After Saturday I'm gonna be reborn like Jesus and no drugs until edc
Emoji's do wonders when you actually have nothing at all to say..
I got my dick out in a gay bar for just one free shot. I didn't know I could be bought so cheap
She had her pubic hair down there shaved into the superman s............. Best one night stand ever.
Went to the lab to print and realized the guy next to me was the one we stole all the beer from last night..... Oops
My vagina is very pro this idea
Randomize
