Yea went to the bars and he called me 2 hours later with random people saying he is at a place that i don't think exists
Yeah she is in it for the money, wait til she finds out i am broke and the sex doesnt get better
I woke up wearing just my underwear and a headlamp at a different house than I remember passing out at. I told you irish car bombs are not made with an entire guinness.
I passed out in the VIP room and she charged me for 17 songs until I woke up, theres a bouncer asking me for $700, fuck tequila
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Only in this snowstorm did have I realized the lengths I'll go to to get laid.
I knew we would be good together when you made me lick jameson off your boob while you screamed along with racks on racks
How many beers are too many "cause it's Archer Thursday" beers?
In case you're keeping score at home, this is Brad's SECOND Doritos-related trip to the ER.
Just had the "whores are people too" talk with Mom. Bright side it's Christmas, and I may have been drunk, I don't think she caught on.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
is one penis in the hand worth one better nicer penis in the manscaped bush?
In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
You were a hurricane of blowjobs and glitter makeup. You came out of the closet and took the house down with it
That's pretty intense. There aren't many people I would pick over a burrito
Just puked in front of a high school tour group. Based on the standing ovation, we have a solid group of freshman coming in this fall.
It started with drunk jenga and ended with me simultaneously peeing and puking on his feet in the tub while he held me up. I met Tequila. I don't like her.
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