Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
I'm going to go hang out on a giant wooden pirate ship for 5 days.
i feel like my life has become an afroman song and idk whether i should be sad about that or not
Wish I didn't live with 3 girls so I could beat off in peace.
You lit the bowl with a rolled up paper towel that you ignited on the stove.
this kid woke up on our hotel floor and doesnt know how he got here
on my way back.. me and that kid will be great friends
We came back and there was a shotglass filled with what looks like blood. Come over soon, we're gonna try it out.
We've gotten 3 pitchers already by trading for CUPCAKES
I just coughed and my vagina hurt. We need to hook up more.
I guess "Ass Fun Friday" is not a thing no matter how many times I say it or bring it up in conversation...
I don't give a fuck that he's gay and keeps hitting on me. Free cocaine is free cocaine bro
There is no issue with you seeing me...morally or ethically. we'll update your resume anyway. I really need to have sex with you later. Really
Can I fire a pigeon out of a t shirt gun?
his penis was like the majestic horn of a unicorn and I came like a million trumpeting rainbows.
you were grinding on the cop whispering for him to lend you his tazer.
Randomize
