I boned her and wore a Freddy mask once. It was pretty lol
i wish peter jackson would direct porn
I'm blazed at jack in the box and my order number is 420. I wish everything in the world made this much sense.
Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
Im so hungover that my 6 year old cousine made me aspirine and coffee out of playdoh...
You are the only person I know that goes to a bar enough to charge your iPhone there....
Ha, I bet. You tipped the waitress like 10 bucks for a glass of water.
His penis is small and he doesnt like Harry Potter. HE HAS NO REDEEMING QUALITIES WHAT AM I EVEN DOING HERE
We could get her a gift basket of Xanax l
Sangria Flip Cup was probably one of our worse drunken decisions
Excuse me while I gouge out my eyes.
In which case my work here is done.
Nothing like a near-death experience to start off your Thanksgiving...
well, i found him passed out on a picnic table two miles away with a lit cig in his hand...he had a rough night
I SHOULD BE TERRIFIED OF HIS DRAGON DICK.
The guy i took home was a circus freak. He jerked off 3 times in front me after we had sex. And he came every time.
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