We need to have an Itty-Bitty Titty Committee mtg somewhere in the range of 5 minutes to ASAP.
If hangovers were people John Goodman would be living in my skull trying to eat the back of my eyes
New pre-game routine....wal-mart bathrooms...quality beers for free...hallelujah
my one-armed grandma is doing the YMCA. you figure it out.
She kept chasing him yelling thief, because he drank some of her drink. That was at 8, it got worse.
i wanna meet her so much more now that I know she got toed in a hottub.
While looking for an apartment, I've realized that the way I rate balconies is on the "how easy would it be to smoke weed here" scale.
What other scale is there?
Good. We don't answer calls at dick thirty.
Can't tonight. I'm supposed to get drugs for some college kids. Just doin my part in helping to enlight america's future
I just want my birth control to stop making me feel like I'm watching baby seals get clubbed to death any time anything even remotely unpleasant happens lol
It was weird, because he kept shaking his head like he was motorboating me...but on my vagina.
I just had a sex dream about orange juice, so there's that.
He asked if we were going to take advantage of his drunken state. When we said no he tired to show us what we were missing out on. It was so sad it almost made him cute.
Legit hope my Trump humping Brother dies of this shit so I can stop pretending to still love him.
I texted her mom a picture of us doing it saying "I'm trying to make your daughter just like you!" she was not amused.
Randomize
