I can't tonight. I'm still nursing a beach sex injury. Don't wanna talk about it.
Would it be horrible to send my ex's girlfriend an email telling her that I sexed her man up so dirty that he fell asleep inside of me afterwards?
maybe touching the ground while going 70 wasn't such a great idea after all..
We had sex on the first date...do you think he thinks I'm a whore?
Yes and so do I
these two guys are about to go shot for shot with syrup
now he is talking to a potato
Met the five year old's gym teacher for next year. He is an old drinking buddy and I used to fuck his older brother. It was like a walk of shame 20 years late.
He asked me to grab his balls and yell "thats a spicy meat-a-ball" Last time I do requests.
So my dad just walked in on me with the same girl twice in 3 nights. I told him if he wants to see her tits to adleast admit it. All he did was smirk.
if you do the accent, i'll wear the eyepatch
Why is there puke in my guitar?
Because you puked in your guitar.
I woke up naked and only wearing cowboy boots, wrapped in a curtain that was still attached to the pole
I hate him but I love him for what he does which is me
He's completely obsessed with his ex but gives phenomenal head. So overall, yeah, good first date.
I've got two reasons for you to come over later and one of them is pierced.
Just fucked my ex's brother. It is clear I dated the wrong one. Is it wrong for me to continue to fuck this one?
Randomize
