But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
You're the only person with a favorite bar in Disneyworld
Yeah I tried to leave with 3 drinks and the bouncer wouldn't let me, I slammed all 3 right in front of him and football spiked them in the trash can
I woke up to you in just boxers at my door at 7a.m. with you saying how many squrriels you counted on the walk back, then you made me penis shaped pancakes
mid blow job she looked up and said "we aren't even facebook friends!"
I dropped my blunt out the window of a moving car by accident, tell me everything will be okay
Posting happy birthday to my grandpa on Facebook.... Then realizing my profile pic is me dressed as a slutty cop when he used to be a police officer.
One day her vagina is just going to shrivel up and seal itself with it's self preservation mechanism
You shall now refer to my vagina as patty and patty only
is it too soon to tell him I'm available anytime for Christmas themed pity sex and I'll even wear a Santa hat?
I spent the entire party sexting people's significant others for them because they were too drunk to do it themselves. I did quite well too. I should start a business
i knew my hormones were back to normal when i went to ikea and didn't want to fuck any of the workers
Helped a guy at work today that did nothing but stare at my chest....safe to say the Girls were looking G.O.O.D. today.
HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED
My vagina is the only part of me that is pleased you lived through last night.
Randomize
