I'm not really sure how I got home, but judging by this headache, i'm assuming it involved bourbon.
Yo, if someone calls you asking for John Stamos, just go with it.
I really like you, but I want to get to know you on a time when I am not at drugs.
I'm puking to John Mayor, save me. Or at least change it to somethong beyyt
her best friend is in town and she told me that they used to fool around when they were drunk and I'd have to "help keep that from happening"
you motherfucker
After we were done the second time she turned to me and called me a Hardcore Armadillo. Also, her O face involves crossed eyes. You tell me.
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
I have a third degree burn on my inner thigh from the blunt dropping on me in the car
Something about the fact that I could do coke off her ass cheeks just speaks to me
On the other hand, this could be a new level of shame for me.
Ya know, one would think a restraining order would keep me from fucking my ex.
Accidentally made a straight guy question his sexuality again. I really gotta watch myself.
I swear, I make more use of my creative writing major with sexting than I do with anything else
Now after not puking, next step is not to do the accent when immigration says "hello."
Is that strawberry winking at me??
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