Two hours into move in day and the ambulance is here already.
he was playing drums on rock band as i poured bailey's into his mouth. tell me that's not a bonding moment.
... was I dreaming when we did coke off of the xbox, or did that really happen?
I told him I'd rather have sex with his father last night. I'll admit now that I was drunk.
My dad got me a charm braclet....his way of trying to support my gayness....
Yeah dude. Pulled out the couch and a bird flew at me. Please tell me who put a bird in my house.
I'm scared to see what happens if we keep winning like this. I don't think there enough livers for every one after the season is over.
my vagradar is going off.. it smells a soldier
I wanna just rip ass and see his reaction but i bet itd be better to shatter that illusion when hes drunk
I woke up and discovered I gave new meaning to the term "pizza pockets" yes it's exactly like it sounds like
we should definitely drink gin again. soon.
Fine line between drunken accidental sleepover with your best friend's lab partner and gay sexathon. I did a cartwheel over that line. A CARTWHEEL THAT LANDED IN HIS LAP
I need two food groups: booze and turkey sandwiches
PS: bike ride of shame at 7am includes riding by kids waiting for the school bus #classy
i like beer, sex, and cooking. what more can he want?
Just come here quick. I'm home in 3min. It will take you literally less than 5 to walk. Then 2 to undress, 16 to fuck, 2 to dress again and 5 to walk back..!!
exactly 16 eh??
Randomize
