i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
he said "you're pretty" then i made out with him. thats all it took
All I remember was yelling at him, "Its becasue of people like you that it took us so long to get to the moon!"
four guys that i have slept with have come into my job today. FOUR. i feel like it's like bring your sex partners to work day.
He was eating her out on the elevator. What a good man.
do you find it slutty that the last person I had sex with is also the person who sings my ringtone ?
The way I see it, everyone on campus has a fake, but I'm the only person who actually makes beer in their dorm.
You were so calm and collected as you strolled out the door with 40 mcdonalds cups in your arms. It was legendary.
He has been feeding me cheesecake and candy for breakfast. Naked. For three days. How am I ever going to leave????
She said she is going to be sex-slave version of Princess Leia for halloween. You think there is any way I could pull off an attractive Jabba suit?
It was the easiest thing I've ever done. 3am she walked into my room, saw my Buffalo Bills blanket, said go bills and got naked.
At about 2:30 i found you passed out in my closet with your face covered in cheese whiz
Rarely does a man I fucked with upgrade from me
He is completely naked, curled in a ball, and rocking back and forth in the shower humming lullabies to himself. This is your responsibility since I'm going to be fucking someone in 5.7 seconds.
If I die bedazzle my coffin please.
Randomize
