And God said, "Let there be Twilight," and it was so.
I should injure you considerably.
Dude also, my grandma got me condoms for easter and kind of winked. I don't know what to think
Funny favor to ask you... can you ask James to ask Chris if he came in me ? Trying to assess whether or not I need plan B.
Its name is Richard. And I think he formally introduced us.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
WHAT DO YOU MEAN I DIDN'T APOLOGIZE? THERE WAS A PEACE OFFERING MADE VIA TACO BELL.
My printer just jammed because one of the condom wrappers I threw when we had sex in my dorm
"Every minute you spend hanging out with David is a minute you could spend meeting someone new, who isn't a huge douche" - Buddha
At one point he was so drunk he was carrying around a bottle of patron drinking out of it and falling everywhere and every time he spilled it he would scream "THERE GOES TWENTY DOLLARS."
exhale infront of a fan. self shotgun.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm just mad because I can't play gta5 all day tomorrow cuz I'll be in court testifying against a craigslist prostitute...
you dont know your limits until you wake up with a black eye and a bruised rib and find out you got ran over by a bicycle last night
There's nothing like when u really click with a stripper
I complemented his smile, he sends me a dick pic. Seriously?
UGH I HATE BEING THIS WAY IM GOING TO GO HUG THE CACTUS YOU GOT ME
He got mad at you last time bc you tried to rap battle him via text. This is strictly business.
Randomize