I just tried to drunkenly fart the beat of Disturbia by Rihanna
I have all these new brothers and sisters I'm just now finding out about
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
i just traded a sweatshirt for margaritas... why did they ever stop using the barter system??!!
im keeping my plan b box as a souvenir of my first halloween weekend in college
just peed in the tub. didnt notice the passed out drunk guys there until a minute in
i wasn't about to bring her gummy handcuffs to her father's funeral
Fucking finally I'm about to die from sobriety over here
I misunderstood what a furry was. Come pick me up.
I just went through the Wendy's drive thru only wearing a towel. My life has hit an all time low
My entire grocery store purchase consisted of Little Debbie snacks and Budweiser
Im so hungover I just threw up at the sight of a CARTOON CRABBY PATTY
He managed to rip my nipple last night....
As long as it's before midnight it's cool. But it would be understandable to ring in my new year shitting myself just before I go to Iraq.
I will warn you that there is a pic of me riding a buffalo....and for the record, I was completely sober!!
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