Who said anything about talking that was a booty call
So when exactly did I get naked and makeout with the statue?
Whats contracted in vegas does not stay in vegas....
He had a ladies night special at his place. Unlimited jello shots till 10, 50 cents after.
Thank god Shes going home for winter break, gives my dick a chance to recover from those "bjs." Youd think a senior could suck a dick by now.
I think I sprained my soul last night
You're telling me you've never sent a picture of your cock to a girl and then were all like "Oops, sorry, wrong person! By the way...You like?"
No. More. Tequila. Even the hot dog guy felt bad for me and you know that guy has seen some crazy shit.
Deciding whether to take my sex toys home for Christmas will be the biggest decision I make this holiday season
I just sat on the floor of my shower for 20 minutes to punish myself for drunk me's decisions.
His Australian accent during sex made me think I was in an Outback Steakhouse commercial
Sexting and pancakes... It's going to be hard to top that
Sometimes, it’s important to take a moment and kinkshame yourself.
we've dated a week and made out twice. he is taking it slow. but his body is stupid sexy. just want him to stop respecting me and fuck me like a gutter slut. respect me later im not getting younger.
do nipples grow back?
Randomize
