I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
so I got guilt tripped into giving her a new years kiss, and she proceeded to try and eat my face while mounting me. when you give a mouse a cookie...
He took me by the hand and ordered me to make him vodka soup.. I think I like him?
Tim said I dropped my taco in a puddle and still ate it.
All I remember is him trying to go down on me, but I guess I was too busy making out with his brother
This is now the friendly bartender typing for him. He wants to be on you. He is going to "destroy your vagina". Good luck and sorry if this woke you up!
when was she peeing in the stairwell? why dont i remember this?
....because generally we only remember 40% of the night each, and have to fill eachother in. And that still leaves 20% that we will never know and its probably for the best
What is she getting? Last time we talked her behavior was conducive to getting a tramp stamp on her face.
Guess who just got out of a ticket because the cop liked her costume? THIS GIRL.
Suppose hypothetically u received a request for face time communication with a gentleman who looked astonishingly like a penis. Would you indulge him in conversation? Hypothetically of course.
If you sleep with him again I'll have you spayed
bitch, i have a flask. i've got things under control.
god. marry me.
The last I heard from her she said she was going to plant sunflowers, get drunk on white wine and listen to Everybody Wants to Rule the World on repeat.
And I hope you're not misinterpreting us fucking as me trying to win you back. The sex is good and girls have needs.
YOU ARE THE ONLY PERSON I KNOW THAT STEALTH CLEANS PEOPLE TOILETS
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