it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
The dr is doing well, he randomly asked if I was bi
...there is blood under my fingernails.
...I hope my roomates are okay.
All I remember from my 21st is crying because the bouncer made him put his shirt back on
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
according to the contents of this bucket, last night i swallowed a whole teabag
woke up holding a soft boiled egg cup and empty bottle of rum. apparently i couldn't find a shot glass
thats why a responsible adult always keeps some facial hair just in case they need to shave a hulk hogan mustache for midget wrestling...
We shot off some fireworks at 12 and then I orchestrated the group singing of god bless the USA all while wearing a don't tread on me flag as a cape. I repped hard.
She crossed her eyes and threw up into a glass while sitting at the bar. It was fifty shades of sketchy dude.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This guy on Hoarders just said "we're all about 4 or 5 decisions away from shitting in a bucket". True dat
There's a lady lying down on the sidewalk in front of our building smoking a cig
How did you tell her we met?
I told her that we met at the sex shop down the street, I thought it would be the most reasonable explanation.
look when god gives you a dick that good for his son's birthday you don't question it
Can we get pizza? This is seriously not a booty call. I just really want someone to get pizza with me.
This might be the worst thing you've ever done.
Really? I feel like I've done worse. Guess I gotta step my game up.
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