So apparently I told him I was off to go "whore skipping" and I disappeared into the night skipping down the street. I know this because there's video.
HOLY SHIT! Did you see the dick on that Great White Shark?!?!?!
CONFIRMATION: i wiki searched it and Justin Bieber is 15 not 13. so i dont feel like as much of a pedofile now....
so they made cookies with their faces printed on them...I ate jaime...she tasted like poop
Just pulled my keys, cell-phone and a pack of cigarettes out from between my cleavage. This one guy's face was priceless.
you were crying because peter frampton wasnt your dad
Telling me its the beginning of school is like telling me the crown royal fairy has come back from vacation.
Using what I learned in my global terrorism class last semester to sneak booze onto my cruise. thanks college.
I just reenacted what a cuntadactyl would act like by putting straws in my mouth as teeth and roaring, Plz come get me.
And here i was gonna offer you a complimentary blowjob.
Just used water from the fish tank for the bong. Thank you fishy.
It seems that only way I've actually improved myself after 2 years of writing for the school newspaper is that I've mastered the art of descriptive words to improve my sexting skills
The comfort of this onesie is keeping me single
It was a glorious ass. He has amazing hands. I want to fuck him until he can't do math anymore.
I cant wait to tell our kids we met because you subscribed to my onlyfans.
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