Was i wearing a white blazer when you superpoke danced me??
Yo I'm just eating dinner now. U ready to go out?
Ya ya. Where you eating?
Cereal and beer. U kno u want in.
I tried to gradually lead her into my room but she wouldn't stop crying and quoting memoirs of a geisha
Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
you know its a sad night when you can actually see and hear sitcoms on at the bar
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
It's official, I've know hooked up with everyone I carpooled with in middle school
I came home drunk to my night light on and a Hershey's bar on my bed. Mom knows me too well.
I called him and he said hell call me back hes in the middle of his kareokee song he was out by himself and his dog
You started crawling towards a moving train. Maybe you should take it easy next time
I've had more lap dances than hrs of sleep since Thursday, this is why you're planning all three of my bachelor parties
I mean, except for the part where I was vomiting up pineapple and hot sauce, it was a really fun time.
I don't remember anything but bad decisions last night
If me saying "come f***k me now" is talking, then yes.
At one point did I say I have a doctorate in fuck u?
Randomize
