I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
did u really fuck my little sister???
im not saying yes or no but just know that my answer rhymes with "mess"
At the miami airport. Don't know if it's all the tequila I drank in cozumel or the 5 year olds french accent but I might puke.
We're too lazy to do dishes, so we're making sangria in a flower vase.
I swear every time I make the effort to make my hair look nice, someone jizzes in it.
I'm pretty sure you thought I could absorb alcohol through my dress
so he woke up after being passed out and yelled that he had brought back moon rocks for everybody...
just lying in bed drinking beer with a straw waiting for motivation. why?
They just caught the deck on fire and I ran out with cups off the beer pong table filled with water from the toilet. It was the closest water source.
It's kind of like, standing in a garage and pretending you're a car. Except you're naked.
Pornhub is still operational. Therefore, the world has NOT come to an end in the blizzard!
These muscle relaxers obviously don't work because I'm harder than a fucking diamond.
Woke up this morning with girl, I ask her for some gum. She says "there's a guest toothbrush for the boys in my bathroom". I can't decide whats worse, that she has a shack brush or that I actually used it
Ever find a porn video so groundbreaking you mentally cancel all your Dick Appointments for the week?
Randomize
