We've been fucking since Friday.... This is the most committed non-committed relationship I've ever been in
Is it physically possible to shit out my own bone marrow? Because if not, then I need to see a doctor immediately.
Yes, that was me on the jumbo tron. No, i don't know why i was hiding.
Well if my looks don't work with her I'll eat the 50 nuggets to impress her fat roommate.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Important update! My next door neighbours have a canoe. Repeat: THEY HAVE A CANOE! We are having sex in it before this summer is over.
An don't say it's "personal preference" cause I don't buy it. I just want to have normal cool guy balls. I don't want to be the dude that's still rocking the equivalent of the "mid 90's bowl cut" of scrotum haircuts.
they told me if I wanted to live here I had to get an ass tattoo and then they all mooned me simultaneously. ass tattoos as far as the eye could see.
Sorry about the whole your mom seeing my face up your ass situation
Dude. There are selfies on my phone of me, wide-eyed, sucking my pillow. We did NOT split that bag 50/50.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I definitely fucked a guy while holding on to his pigtails like reigns last night.
The most literal cowgirl position ever.
Yes, you can go into Petsmart drunk but the cats awaiting adoption don't appreciate the soft pretzels squeezed through their cages.
Just showed my drunk fiancé where I got circumcised, she's been crying for twenty minutes.
Not sure if I should ask if I can have my underwear back or just avoid that all together.
answer honestly do you think i can make a bloody mary with ketchup????
Finally hooked up with Ryan. Now I know why they call him “Beast Mode”. So. Many. Orgasms.
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