yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
she just waddled down the stairs behind me and puked and kind of reached for me but i sped up. does that make me a bad person?
Then I opened the closet and then i found the babies
wtf
I'm guessing you saw the bathroom?
No subtext here. People are naked.
The difference between what I would do for a regular Klondike bar and an Oreo flavored Klondike bar is astounding
Just because it's been in my vagina doesn't mean it's important to me
It was like the perfect storm of bad decisions.
4 girls from the bar, me, strip basketball. here. NOW
I am too drunk to be out in this weather around all these animals.
I'm sorry that I didn't get belligerently drunk and did not put my penis on your neck again
Just saw a couple do like 5 Sakai bombs and my dad goes "who says love is dead"
I didn't realize how trashy of a night we had.
Welllll, you did eat a cherry out of my pussy. So I think that classes it up a little.
How drunk is too drunk to be on an airplane?
I just fucked her boyfriend. Happy birthday, bitch.
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