Yeah he is here but I can't let him know I am until he has like 30 min worth of drinks. so when he see me he isn't like "omg ew,NO!"
I have so much to learn from you, wise slut
hows that letter of apology to the waitress at waffle house coming?
Fuck you. how could you leave me passed out hangin out my truck window when you knew it was starting to rain?
Glad we went casual last night, made my 1pm walk of shame through Walmart a little less obvious
I still don't know why you took that job... it sounds miserable
not having any beer money sounds even more miserable
My only objective is to get drunk enough to forget the last 364 days.
You have to keep an eye on her tonight cause you know how she likes to pickpocket people when she's drunk.
My lower body still feels like its been through a garbage disposal and a trash compactor. In that order.
Sleeping with random people is the same as soul searching, right? Ps that wasn't a team name suggestion.
Things in my bed this morning: a Waffle House hat, a finding nemo DVD, sharpies, my graduation robes and an adult diaper. Did we play drunk scavenger hunt again?
By the way, anytime you want to go toe to toe on Doggystyle lyrics just let me know!
Who is this? Did we just become best friends?!
Dude we smoked with a bunch of random stoners in a forest, then group hugged. It was the most magical thing we've ever done.
Okay so I'm high eating chili cheese fries bra-less watching Mulan, could I be doing any better at life right now?
I feel like I'm in a development meeting for a Lifetime original movie.
Fuck it. I'm going for it. You're only young once, right?
You've been saying that for 5 years now. Let me know when the novelty wears off.
Randomize
