is it bad that the only reason i knew what antidote meant in class today, was from years of playing pokemon?
i wish my apartment had room service that i didn't have to pay for.
didn't have any spoons so I beer bonged my chicken noodle soup. I fucking love camping.
it's fine if we fail the bar, we were never going to satisfy the moral character requirement anyway
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hey thanks again for rolling me that blunt necklace. It was amazing.
I refuse to have another spring break doomed by pregnancy.
She just told me she had a double jointed jaw and winked at me while eating her bananna. That's not possible right?
I couldn't find the bathroom last night...so I wrapped myself in the curtains and stuck my butt out the window and peed from two stories up. Thank god I don't remember.
She just cut the six pack plastic up and screamed "save the dolphins"..she also threw away cans of tuna. I like this girl.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's listening to "my heart will go on" by himself in the living and its not even noon. MAKE IT STOP.
This snow needs to melt so I can get wasted on someones front lawn
Now: to brush my teeth, put on my grandma slippers and earplugs, masturbate to 50 Shades and then PTFO
when in doubt, mount your coworker in the staff room.
just ran into my drill sergeant from basic 4 years ago. gonna take him home and have him fuck me at the cadence of quick time.
I legit just swiped right with a Tinder feminist just to get in an argument with her. Soo that's my Friday night so far...
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