how was that guy you hooked up with?
i used to think blowing a .05 was a good thing
chinese tourists just took a picture of me....im pretty sure i heard the bus drive say something about shame.
Word is he has some crazy hawaiian STD
Do you remember puking up your retainer into the toilet and putting it right back in your mouth?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I cannot even. Taco bell reception. Beers. New friends from Georgia.
I showed that dick picture that your date texted you to everyone because you passed out and left your phone unattended. Your fault. Plus his cock was big so his fault too.
I wanna throw up and cum in that order
I think my new low is running outside in a towel to pet a particularly fluffy looking squirrel and projectile vomiting off the balcony.
So I hear you're taking over showing your penis responsibilities now that I'm gone?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm sad we weren't friends when I went through my "I like drugging my friends" phase
Worst case: you're extra horny, have no control of your mouth or actions, and maybe murder someone. Child's play.
not only was there glitter in the toilet after i peed, but there was some on the toilet paper after i wiped. this cant be healthy.
Ate 5 hotdogs today. You need to get me back on my tequila diet cause this shit has to stop!
Its really awkward pooping while on videochat. Even if you turn the video off.
How was your weekend?
My girlfriend decided the best way to get my mind off of my dog dying was to break up with me via text
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