I just wanted to let you know that if you dont tell me to stop texting i will still keep on trying, you matter to me
restraining order is on its way, crazy bitch
On a scale of affliction to ed hardy, how douchy is in there right now?
Great. There's a birthday party at work today. Now I can stand around and feel uncomfortable for an hour.
I successfully cooked a taquito with a lighter! My stomach hurts now tho.. im either guna blame it on the undercooked taquito or im feeling guily about porkin my brothers gf a lil bit ago
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there are way too many $1s in my wallet for last night to have been 'tame'
Today my mom told me "that's what worries me about you getting blacked out drunk... You don't look pretty"
Next time I see you, remind me to tell you how I fell through my attic door and landed on my feet in the garage on the first floor.
I hooked up with some guy to get over my ex last night. I was terrified until we started doing naked pushups.
In case you wake up wondering why your eyes hurt... You were claiming to be Zeus and that mortal weapons couldn't harm you. Some chick took it as a challenge and pepper sprayed you. Sorry dude.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It must suffice lest there secretly exist a picture of me walking out of the ocean at midnight naked and half mast with a sea urchin on my ass
you were bawling because you felt bad for being so drunk and then you asked for a beer
He said he was Greek American and that is why my legs slammed shut. During the World Cup there are only Americans.
Every time I start to think he's just not worth the trouble, he puts his face down there and I wanna buy him a car
Being a fine ass woman in a world full of fuckboys is the realest struggle I've ever known.
I'm kind of pissed I'm not hungover, that means I could have totally drank more last night.
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