I hope my future cuntsucker is that tight
im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
I mean I gotta puke to be skinny, wax to be hairless, and drink to be fun. Life isn't easy.
What's the big deal? you guys fuck
3 times is my limit. I don't even want to know you exist after 3 times
she left around the point i tried to tie her hair around my dick
Like lay upon bear skin rugs, drink brandy and reminisce of the yesteryear's before a majestic fire place? Because those are my plans.
Is this like a "I'm taking you out to dinner and treating you with respect" kind of date, or is this a "I'm gonna fill you with alcohol and cheese and stuff my dick in your anus" kind of date?
He returned my car yesterday. Found a duffel bag with beef jerky, condoms, and a handgun this morning. Slightly concerned
Just had to find a way to explain to the border patrol that we were coming into canada "for about a half hour to have one last under 21 drink before kendals birthday at midnight." He said ok and told us where the closest bar was. Nice man.
Some kids in a school bus just saw me jacking off in my car. This is how 89% of children find out about sex.
I can already see the regret in her eyes. Amazing night. This city rules.
I really want to throw this drink in your face but it was 6 dollars that shits expensive
I just washed my birth control down with captain because I don't have any water and I need to wash the blood off my face before I leave my room.....
Remember when I said I had my shit together?
Ate his Chinese food and drank his beer and played with his chihuahua. All while wrapped in a towel while he was sleep.
What use have I for dignity? It just get's in the way of the really fun stuff.
Randomize
