The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?
You put a thong on my pumpkin didn't you.
How was the bike ride?
Nope. High in the basement. Fruit cups.
thinking back, the fact that our bartender was missing a finger shouldve been hint number one not to let him pick our drinks
That chick needs a catscan. And fuck it, we're still ordering in a stripper
The bank teller laughed at me....I'm apparently that fucking hungover looking
All I wanted was my $85. Judgement free. But nooooo
He's going to let me keep his bowl in my car. Does that make us Facebook official?
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
What's the sex policy on a school bus? Because I dibs back seat.
Sex allowed. Dress code is neon and obnoxious.
We are gonna die. I wanna enforce the "no jumping out of moving vehicles" policy. And how are we gonna get a school bus through mcdonalds drive thru?
Your loyalty to the Redskins reminds me how no matter how much I disappoint you, you will still always be rooting for me.
IDK I WAS CAUGHT UP IN THE TEQUILA SHOTS AND FRIENDSHIP
The hospital waiting room is starting to become a very familiar place to me.
He is in my tree wearing full on scuba gear ... Get here asap.
Hey, thanks for helping me this morning
Always a pleasure to feed you bread as your body lay crumpled on the floor.
Turns out tits aren't quite as effective an enticement when they know for a fact that they can't touch.
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