I'm really into asian looking animals
I am now the proud owner of a 10-12 year old's Optimus Prime costume from Walmart. Tomorrow is going to be a good day.
So my professor just changed my Final to 7:45am on May 6th. Shouldn't a Spanish professor understand the implications of Cinco de Mayo???
hotel security told us you walked into the hotel with blood all over your dress, weren't wearing any underwear and were escorted back by three men who were believed to be "homosexuals".
Theres a handprint of sauce on my frig, one streaked across my face, a trail of it to my bedroom and sauce all in my bed and i have no idea what the fuck i ate.
It's one of those days where you order the free Papa John's pizza so the delivery guy can bring you Coke to go with your rum. The tip was more than the order.
No, man, we stole the housekeeper's key and we're just going room to room raiding mini fridges. Hurry
Logan has the vodka and snickers. We're making a run for it. Room 302
whiskey
stop
tequila
you're fuckin up my ability to be a agrown up
Ps I think male models just broke down outside or maybe gay German sex travelers
Just made a diving catch to save a handle of Fireball falling out of the car. ESPN worthy.
Some rando guy literally just put my shoes on and tied them for me because I'm drunk... Is this what it feels like to be a princess?
Last night was incredible. I can tell by the nacho cheese on my jacket
We got to his house, cuddled while watching game of thrones, then fucked during the repeat airing.
What are best friends for?
Picking your clothes up from a one night stand you had nearly 2 months ago
I'm saying "I told you so" now so that I don't slow down to say it on the way to grab the fire extinguisher
Randomize
