I just found that girl ____ on facebook, her activities include "church nursery" yikes
Ok never mind. Thought i pooped my pants for a second. False alarm.
Small penises have feelings too.
Does it bother you that I left your underwear hanging in a tree at the zoo? i think the turtles are enjoying it.
She was sleeping without a shirt so I thought I wouldI sneaked a peek at her nipples..than I realized they were just warts...on her back.
He cant even get with danielle. Thats like striking out in t-ball
i took an adderall last night to write a paper. i ended up watching 7 hours of roseanne and couldn't look away
We went to his house and he brought a jar of pickles to bed. I think im in love.
Either he was jacking off or having a seizure next to me in bed. Either way, I was too lazy to help.
I love my boobs, they're the only thing that supports me. They make me a solid 6.
I know. I need to get a vagina tranquilizer.
Just ate a gummy bear I found in my sheets. So yeah, 2013 is SO gonna be my year.
Hey, YOU try working out drunk every night! Besides, I think at least one of those bruises is a hickey.
I'm hungover and eating lunch at an elementary school. The children are barking. Litrealy barking, like dogs.
Nice people suck dick too. I'm proof.
Randomize
