We video chatted for almost two hours. But I woke up with puke on my keyboard. The question of the day: were we still chatting when I vommed? No idea.
And. No one ejaculated on anyones face. This is all wrong
I know you didn't add your TWO random hook ups from the weekend to your FB friends AND change your status to "Good Catholic Girl" on the same day.
no memory loss, but i'm unhappy with my memories
Guy passed out in the lobby with a keychain sharpie hanging from his belt loop. 1 guest came in and wrote on him, then others saw and got in line. I'm not waking him up.
Last night must have been awesome, my dog still smells like vomit.
Leave it to him to get us kicked out of a bar for hitting on an 80 year old woman. I want to be that wasted one day.
Why did 20 jello shots in a row sound like a good idea last night?
I don't know what I should tell you tell you. I don't want to encourage you to dye my dog.
some drunk bitch driving a golf cart ran over the live band... its bad.
you have a wonderful penis attached to someone I'm having a lot of problems with right now
Zach, it's Lisa from work. Was that you yeiling BALLS DEEP at me on I-25 or is it just something about me that invites that from rando creeps?
Im eating leftover Easter ham in a bubble bath. What has my life come to?
About to go make a man out of a 24 year old boy
As I shove my ninth taquito of the day into my mouth...
Picking our battles
I don't think Buddha would recommend a sexscpade across Mexico
Randomize
