i got pulled over in my 'cops love me' tshirt. he didn't think it was funny when i pointed it out.
Drinking Grey Goose on the toilet. Don't make me graduate.
she made me put on a condom before giving me a handjob...this is why i hate freshmen
Sharon took in a random bleeding stranger drunker than her, named her Nicole, and is feeding her jello shots on the toilet
25 People Confess Their Favorite Way To Annoy Their Significant Other
I'm fucking an ugly guy. Don't come home.
well now I have to
Grad practice is like a live scrapbook of my drunken sexual encounters
I've never felt so inclined to grow a dick. THIS is what the gays in this town have done to me
Just saw the guy with the plastic bag on his head riding his bike again...
Your whole purpose in life is to just float around and satisfy lonely women and also join lesbian couples in threesomes.
These 21 Women Share What Sexual Harassment In The Military Is Really Like
Well, I tried to shit into my refrigerator. It was a rough night.
I asked if anyone's pants felt wet on the bottom, like a half hour after mine did. I had just peed my pants i had gotten so high no biggie
His name is Angel. I'm pretty sure he was sent from heaven solely to eat me out.
THERE IS WEED IN MY OVEN. HOW AM I EVER SUPPOSED TO MAKE CHICKEN PARMESAN WITH WEED IN MY OVEN.
Sorry I wore your bra during sex last night
*goes to show prof a picture* *forgets tit pic is in camera roll*