their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
I've never had a man I enjoyed more than steak
Just saw some guy walking down the street rapping about various types of pasta.
I'm officially my mother.. Smoking in the garage pretending to take the dog out in a big ugly jacket
Getting drunk now, but later remind me to tell you how to crash an 8th grade grad party.
So hungover. They actually hid easter eggs around me.
Hey do you want me to wrap up that Jack in the Box you left in my gutter
Also, not pregnant! Way to go uterus! Good job on being a team player!
I mean two cocks this time. Trust me, I'm not gonna pull the same stunts as last time in this situation
I respect the size of her balls.
Yeah but I don't respect the size of her anything else.
Is it acceptable to have my intern get me pedialite and plan b?
It's a learning experience. She can add to her resume that she cured her bosses hangover and poor decisions
I never forget a pussy, even blackout me gives me that memory.
Maybe they'll dismiss me from jury duty after they smell beer on me. You can't keep me in a cage and then give me an hour and a half long lunch break next to a beer fest and expect sobriety.
So, I just ordered a breathalyzer for this weekend. I figured if I'm getting shitfaced, I should at least be scientific about it.
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
Randomize
