im poppin the ladies like they're bacne
can you take me to a tanning bed
sure, why though?
i have to go once so i can blame these herpes on the tanning bed and she won't get suspicious
Woke up in a closet. I'm not drinking till summer.
I wish there were college classes that were useful to your daily life, like how to pack a proper bowl in pitch black darkness.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im sleeping in a hamic at a mansion. best hangover ever
Also, new rule: You are no longer allowed to send me a text with the word "dildo" in it before 10am.
It's a lightpost hitting you in the head. Of course it's going to hurt the day after.
You may genuinely find a use for the siphon. But the bag of human hair is less likely.
No. I want to vom filet mignon and ziti bits everywhere and my body feels like I ran a cock triathalon. I feel less triumphant and more like death.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Not only have I fallen off the wagon, it ran me over and just kept going...
So our trip to Disney World ended in the three of us stripping at a gay club in orlando.
Nah I've been there. The worst you'll see is some hobo peeing in a sewer at 3 am on a Saturday
He spelled Steven with "ph", needless to say my nose was almost bleeding from the amount of axe he was wearing.
I witness him finger a girl behind the dj decks yet I'm still going to meet up with him. Wtf is my life
Do you not realize that being Batman fulfills about 95% of my non-sexual fantasies?
Randomize