The guy asked if i had a problem w/set schedules
Is there a "Plan B" app for my iphone?
the chick you hooked up with on my couch facebook friended me.
just thought you should know her name is kristen
Making a drinking game out of jeopardy does not mean you studied..
I also tried to drunkenly adopt a kitten last night. It didn't pan out.
My relaxing drive may end up as a surprise bootycall in Pittsburgh. Don't try to stop me.
Step 1: drink. 2: drink more. 3: go for it. 4a: success. 4b: drink more. 5. drink. 6. go for other girls. 7. drink more. Sound good?
Somebody found our where I was and called the bar looking for me. When the bartender called my name I finished my beer and took off like a fugitive.
I would seriously fuck her so hard, her contacts would pop out of her eyes.
You are the voice of reason. And I'm bringing wine. Like seriously this is his last chance. Don't touch me once, shame on you.. Don't touch me twice, shame on me
While he was gone for spring break I took his head board... I don't wanna wake up from his shenanigans for the rest of my college career.
unless you have a dick and you were thinking of chopping that off
don't worry, i'm not mad. i'm just angry. and furious. and about to set your ass on fire.
is it still considered wake n bake if you wake up at 2 pm?
What's the point of having a gay best friend if he doesn't play with your titties?
Randomize
