Her bed looked like it had just hosted a water balloon fight. It was that good.
she got to the point every few minutes she checked to see if her boobs were still there.
We have sex, then we talk about foreign policy. Its a win-win.
You need to simmer down or I'm going to buy you a labia leash.
I found a fingernail in my vagina. A fingernail.
4 girls from the bar, me, strip basketball. here. NOW
Suppose hypothetically u received a request for face time communication with a gentleman who looked astonishingly like a penis. Would you indulge him in conversation? Hypothetically of course.
First things first, I always get more drunk than the birthday girl. Like, who's idea was it to sing karaoke? I killed it.
If a treadmill opens up I'll run next to him and then fall off so he has to give me mouth to mouth
You drink too much. You cuss too much. You have questionable morals. You're everything I've ever wanted in a friend.
I'd have to have a ring. Like I don't want to be called "the ex girlfriend that shit on me"
Cum just came out of my nose. That is all.
that guy was staring at your tits.
nah, more like they were staring at him, and his girlfriend, and her less than adequate bosom. they pitied the fool.
point taken, oh mistress of the bosoms.
And you tried to get me to have sex with you in our Harry potter closet lol
Sorry I had sex in your backseat while everyone was in the car
It's quite alright. I found his shorts in my backseat, not sure what he was wearing when we dropped him off
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