I'm on that like soy sauce on rice
i can't watch a movie tonight dude, im smoking weed
you smoke with your eyes?
Corey Haim died. 80's me is so sad
The last thing i remember was high fiving everyone on the planet.
all i remember was you yelling "look at my little feet" at everyone on the way home from the bar.
If i ever start ordering tequila again please tackle me to the ground and steal my wallet
We make out exclusively when we're drunk. That's like a relationship for me, right?
I may or may not have shit out a layer of my liver after that weekend.
I feel like he better crank it up to level RG IV tomorrow. It's the fucking playoffs.
No he's here. We were watching Harry Potter stoned as shit and he fell asleep with his head in my lap. I'll figure out what to do with him after Harry gives Dobby the sock.
Just want to apologize again for asking to spot your form in the shower.
The first thing I did in 2015 was suck a dick.....so.....
I got so drunk I thought my tennis court was a corn field so I laid in it and ate pizza
I'm drunk listening and crying to Selena. How's your Monday?
I JUST AGREED TO GO TO A CHILD'S BIRTHDAY PARTY AT A PLACE CALLED PUZZLE'S FUN DOME WHY DO I HATE MYSELF
Randomize
