She kept saying I was her favorite Jonas brother, and for some reason, I was ok with that.
I am 100% positive that I have seen a porno that was shot in this bar.
It took me 6months to figure out that he only had one testicle.
i'm way too high for it to be safe that i just discovered i have a fire extinguisher
the water pistols in the freezer are full of voddka.
Yeah we call her cincohandjabos because she gave 5 guys handjobs one night in 5th grade
Have you seen Dave? He's not on top of the bar anymore but I found his shirt.
well this is gonna sound really bad but we were fooling around on sandra's electrical wheelchair
I am still sore from last night. I can't wait for you to meet my parents.
What I do when I'm blackout drunk is none of my business.
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
Worst drunk idea ever... Me "Cops are looking for two guys, one in a grey shirt one in a blue shirt" jelly "lets take out shirts off they'll never find us" of course I thought it was brilliant
I drank, I fought, I made my ancestors proud.
And then someone hit me with a pool cue
Just heard him in the middle stall. Sounded like someone emptied a toolbox into the toilet.
I just ordered a five person drink for myself.... Right about now you should start saving me from myself....
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